Am I not good enough?

As creative people, it is often that we come across feelings of insecurity and we question our self-worth.  You’ll find that even some of the most successful creators in the world sometimes struggle with self confidence – the questions ‘Am I not good enough?’ or ‘Do I deserve this?’ lurking in the dark corners of their minds.

You see, to be an artist, you must be able to feel things, emotions, energy and vibes. We let down our guards and open ourselves up to be susceptible to the feel of everything around us, and we try to feel these emotions through, rather than suppress them.  Then we use these emotions and feels create and relate in a meaningful way.  This process can often leave us vulnerable and sensitive.

When you open yourself up to a more emotional state, you often cannot control the feelings that you will absorb or bring up.  It’s why we see some of the best creators in the world struggle with demons of anxiety disorders and depression.

Is it worth it? In my opinion, to feel is to be human, and a life without a certain level of emotion is pointless.  So in with the good vibes – and sometimes the bad.

Sometimes I don’t feel like I’m good enough.  My singing, my ability to perform and teach, my writing, my appearance, my intellect.  And this feeling is often attached to a need for validation.

Social media plays a big part in today’s world as a tool for people to be validated, judged and accepted.  There are people literally dying for views, likes, and follows.  And therefore getting upset and torn down by the lack of these interactions.

Picture this, I spend a week thinking, writing, recording and making a video and original song. And when I post in online, it gets under 10 views, 3 likes an no comments.  No one cares.  Was it a crap song? Do I look bad in the video? Is my vocal not u to scratch? Am I good enough?….Why do I even bother?

10 minutes before posting, I was super proud of my work and feeling a sense of achievement.  And the just like that, I’m shattered.  Maybe by a computer robot that decided not to show my post in friends’ news feed?.  But that doesn’t matter, I’ve already been knocked down.  And sometimes that’s enough to set off a downward spiral into depression.

Then my coping mechanism kicks in.  My state of mind flips over to logical rather than emotional.  I focus on the things I have rather than what I don’t. And slowly the gauge moves from negative to positive.  That is a process I have worked very hard to develop.  I think about the things that I have achieved in my career and life, and  I remember positive comments that people have given me in the past.  I also remember how nice it felt to create my work.  The journey itself, was my reward.  And that’s it people!  The value of creating is in the creating, not the sale.  And that needs to be enough otherwise you will always feel let down.  Self validation is the key.  “I love this piece of work, I enjoyed making it, it’s awesome”.  That should be enough.  But it is easier said than done.

Creatives wake up each day and choose to be vulnerable, and to share personal experiences and emotions with us through their work, for the betterment of the world.  What would the world be like without art and music? Fucking horrible.

And sometimes we fail or are lazy, or too busy to acknowledge that contribution.  And when we fail to support and acknowledge others, we leave room for those people to feel hindered and ask themselves ‘what is the point?’

No I’m not saying that it is your fault that people  sometimes don’t feel good enough.  What I’m saying is:  Try to be a part of the thoughts that derail the negativity.  Try to be part of the coping mechanism.  Be the positive comment in the back of a creative mind.  We all need reassurance sometimes, even the most confident of us.

It’s very simple.  When you see something on social media that you like. Like it.  Better yet, comment on it.  Because the more interaction and response the post gets, the more it will be shown to others.  So many ridiculous posts go viral these days and too often I see real art being overlooked and ignored.

Support your creatives, my friends.  Not just online, go out and see a show, buy an album, share and spread the word.  And tell them. Tell them if you think they are awesome, even if you think that they must hear it all the time from others.  Because one day,  when that person is feeling sub-par, they might think about how you support them and it may just be enough for them to pick themselves up and keep going.  Your simple deed could be that person’s savior.

My fellow creatives, I’m so honored to be in the presence of your talent.  Enjoy creating and don’t let lack of interaction or trolling hinder you.  The journey and process is often more important than the outcome.  The world sees you. The world appreciates you. And the world needs you .  Stay shining.

Roxy Xx

 

PS if you like what I’m doing, feel free to share, comment like and follow.  Or you can support my work on Patreon  at http://www.patreon/roxanelebrasse

 

 

 

 

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